The Cellphone Incident
Apr 7, 02:22 PM
Note: I am writing this on a very much later date but I’m dating the post on the night of the incident.
I always read D’s text messages as far as I can remember. Hey, he’s my husband and we agreed to be transparent and so its okay, right?
Well, I thought I was right. I cannot forgot this incident because it broke my heart in two and it made me furious, as in deadly furious, which doesn’t happen often.
Everything seems to be fine back then. I just got back to my old job which we decided is much better than with a branded company.
I just got in the room and D is texting with his Sony Ericsson P1, lying on the bed. I lay down beside him and peeked on his message. Then, all of the sudden he fucking got angry and told me what am I doing? I was surprised.
Then he told me I am paranoid, I don’t trust him, I am snooping (!?) etc.
I was shocked. I didn’t reacted.
He went outside the room. Bought a cigarette and smoked. It means he’s pissed off.
I tried to ignore. But something’s not right. I am the bad one? My mind just wouldn’t accept it.
I confronted. What’s your problem? I said I have always done that before. We didn’t have any problem with it.
Then, he said I don’t trust him etc. I yelled back that I have always been doing that.
My blood went up to my head. I can’t believe what I am hearing.
I took out my last cigarette from my bag. I felt that I will need more. I went out of the house, bought a pack of cigarette.
After I finished a stick, I have already calmed down.
When I went back to the bedroom, he’s now on the computer. I tried to sleep. But my anger just wouldn’t go away. I went out of the room. I need something to break. I saw our good old broom. I went outside and swish it against a corner of a room. I broke the broom into three parts. I felt much better.
I went inside again and tried to sleep.
I tried to feel numb. I need to sleep. I need to sleep.
Then, I heard a nudge and an apology. I’m still angry.
He told me that maybe he’s the one paranoid after I told him about my former office mates in the previous job.
I told him that its not me who changed. He had changed. A lot.
We ended the night not at war, but still with hurt feelings.
Until now, whenever I think of that night, I could feel chest pain. The wound is still fresh.
The outcome: I try not to touch his cellphone in anyway. I honestly, truly, would like to fucking throw it over the wall! So much for conjugal stuffs. I have learned a lesson. Its just fucking bad that I had to learn it the hard way.
posted by: Abbie
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